I am so fed up right now! My life is so entangled in my family, I am losing who I am! I am so sick of conforming to everyone else requests! I decided to start putting my foot down.
No I will not mop the floor...
That was my response to my husband Friday morning. I was making my daughters lunch for school and drinking my coffee. Lee comes up to me and says, "Hey would you clean the floor today?" My response was simply, "No." Then he starts to complain, "I don't ask much of you, and what else do you have planned today?" *Don't ever mess with me in the morning fuck tard, I am not a morning person!* "I planned on doing laundry and cleaning the house, if you want the floor mopped so bad, it will still be here this weekend." He started to get an attitude, "I didn't ask you to mop the floor I asked you to clean the floor. I just want you to get some spots up because I don't want my house looking like shit if someone comes over." I was livid, I wanted so badly to just tear into him. But no; I didn't, instead I said,"Well I have other things planned for today, so if you want the floors cleaned that bad you can do it this weekend."
He didn't say anything else to me, he just left for work. We didn't speak anymore that day until about lunch time when he called and asked me to mapquest directions.
*Something he does quite often.* I get him directions, and we talk a little bit mostly him asking why I hadn't called him today. I just kept telling him that I wasn't mad at him, I just figured from the way he left this morning he didn't want to talk with me, and it was probably for the best.
That evening, my best friend Christina invited Lee and I to a free beer party at Silverados.*Silverados is a nightclub that is.... oh hell it's really a hillbilly party hole in the wall kind of place, if you go to the website you will see a bunch of backwoods rednecks trying to smile with some really fucked up teeth* Well hell yea! Free beer! Of course I want to go! I convince my mother to watch my children, and Lee starts in on his stupid shit. He kept getting an attitude about going, and complained that he was too tired to hang out with friends. *Well I wanted to go, I needed to go, for my children's safety and my sanity!* I had made spaghetti for dinner and put a bowl for Lee in a Ziploc bag so he could eat it later. *He was meeting us at my mothers house, it was closer to Silverados*
I get to my parents house, and start to settle the girls in when Lee comes in. The first thing he said to me, the first fucking thing... was, "Where's my dinner? Is this the shirt you brought me? Where's the jacket? You know it's cold outside why did you bring me this?" I wanted to say, "Look asshole! You are fucking lucky I remembered to bring you a shirt and shoes! I walked out the door with out them twice! I'm fucking sorry I forgot to grab your spaghetti, we can stop at a fast food restaurant if you are that fucking hungry! Have you ever tried to pack two kids for an overnight stay, get someone else clothes together, clean the kitchen, dining room, and dishes, in less than 30 minutes. Cut me some fucking slack! I did by best!" But no, I apologized, and let him look like a total ass in front of my mother :). Then after he finishes his rant, he picked up Renee and gave her love and said, "Hi" to her. I let this go on for a few minutes, before I look at him and say, "Hi, how was your day? Oh me? Mine was great! *with a giant smile on my face* Did you happen to notice Angel is here too? I'm sure she would love a hug and kiss from you!" I kept smiling the whole time, he just cut his eyes at me and gave me a go to hell look. *I know it was getting under his skin, but geeze, I just can't take his childish tantrums anymore; so I figured if he was acting like a child..... he must want to be treated like one*
Finally we leave my parents house. He takes off tires squealing, he didn't say one word to me on the way there. I had a million things running through my mind that I wanted to say, but again I bit my lip.... literally.
Saturday, I woke to him demanding that I wake up and get the kids because he has to leave. I got up after he finished his fit. I told him that if he wanted to leave, then he needs to ask me to watch the kids, because, quite frankly I was tired of being the one responsible for them 100% of the time. Of course he starts in on his smart ass comments, "What you want me to quit my job so I can play with the kids more? Okay fine, you pay the bills." I told him that on weekends when he's home he should take more responsibility for them..... right like he would ever do that. Nope instead he just left-Oh and he took the van with the car seats, so I couldn't leave!
I HATE IT WHEN HE DOES THAT!!!!!!!!!
*Bastard!*
This morning I woke up and he started asking me to make breakfast, but not just any breakfast. He wanted pancakes. He wanted pancakes the way he likes them, not the way everyone else in the house likes them. *When I make pancakes, I put in vanilla, baking powder, sugar, eggs, Bisquick, and lactose free milk. He wanted regular milk, eggs and Bisquick* Too fucking bad! If I am making pancakes I make them for the majority, not the minority. The kids like them the way I make them, I like them, and Angel can't have regular milk. So here's what I did.... *he won't read this post for a couple days, so I will tell you guys now....* I used Lactose free milk, but got out the regular milk and set it on the counter. I used vanilla, baking powder, and sugar and put them away as soon as I was done. I told him I made them how he liked them, he ate them and couldn't tell a difference. When he reads this post he sure will feel like an ass though, mainly because he ate the pancakes and said how much better the tasted. LOL! :D
Can someone please tell me why men are such asses about shit sometimes?!?!?!?
Lee and I argued all day yesterday. We argued over everything from kids, to money, to character flaws. It just seemed like one of those days.
Today I found the humor in all of it. See...when I argue I tend to use large words to describe things. *I have a pretty extensive vocabulary* My husband *bless his heart* has the vocabulary of a high school freshman. He never found it necessary to learn to spell past the everyday language or learn new words.
Today I began thinking about yesterdays argument and realized that he didn't know that I really insulted him. I started yelling at him, "You are such a narcissistic sociopathic fuck tard!" Him: "I am not a fuck tard!" At the time it didn't even hit me that he had no idea what a narcissist or a sociopath is.
So today I am re-envisioning the argument with a comedic twist...
Me: "You are such a narcissistic sociopathic fuck tard!"
Him: "Hold on!" *as he gets the dictionary* "S-O-C... is that spelled with at c or an s?"
Me: "C!" *tapping foot*
Him: "SO·CI·O·PATH (sō'sē-ə-pāth',) One who is affected with a personality disorder marked by antisocial behavior. so'ci·o·path'ic"
Him: "AN·TI·SO·CIAL (ān'tē-sō'shəl,) Antagonistic toward or disrespectful of others; rude.
Me:raising eyebrows
Him: "AN·TAG·O·NIST (ān-tāg'ə-nĭst) One who opposes and contends against another."
He looks up from the dictionary, " You called me antisocial, rude, disrespectful and opposing in one word?!?
Me: "Forget it... I'm going to bed."
Him yelling across the room: "How do you spell narcissistic? NAR..."
See how funny that argument could have been if he would choose to educate himself on what words really mean?
Okay so arguing is not really funny... but it could be!
Do all men take their wives for idiots, or just mine? Seriously.
Yesterday my husband gets a call at about 11am and it is Benjamen. *The husband of my best friend Christina* Benjamen invites Lee to a round of golf. Of course my husband says yes. I look outside and it's raining. *Oh this is going to be interesting I think to my self* He tells me that tee time is 1pm and that he is also taking my dad.
*Oh this is really going to be interesting* See... my dad is a good guy, he's just very thirsty. My dad loves to golf and is a pretty good golfer. He has played in lots of tournaments and won quite a few times. My husband has never played at an actual golf course, only hit a few balls at the range before. Benjamen is a crappy golfer.... so this will be good.
Lee leaves the house and I am left as usual with the kids and lots of housework. I start laundry and text him asking how many holes they are going to play. He keeps telling me that he doesn't know and will tell me when they get out there.
Of course he never lets me know.... how foolish was I to think he would.
I finally ask again. He tells me 18, "Oh wow" I say. He didn't say anything back. Remember this was all in text because I know that it's rude to talk on the phone on the golf course.
A few hours later it was dark and so I sent him a text asking if they were about done yet.
"nope" is the response I get back. So I ask what hole they are on, then he tells me that they are bringing the carts in because they turned the lights out on them and it was dark.
Okay, I'm always one for a good laugh, but I know better here. Golf courses don't turn lights out that early (5:45pm), and they know how many carts they still have out. They don't turn lights out when they still have carts out. So I begin to question Lee about the odd inconsistency. Then he acts like chicken little," Huh? What you mean? What are we talking about again?" I was getting pissed.
I tried to be patient with him, I really did, but things just weren't fitting in place. I just wanted to smack him up side his head.
He drops everyone off and gets home about 7:45pm. I start to question him on everything.
He continues to lie to me.
"Is that the lie you are gonna stick with?" I ask.
"What do you mean? I'm not lying." He says with this shit eating grin on his face.
"Your story looks like swiss cheese it has so many holes in it!"
"What the fuck went on, what happened, why do you feel the need to lie to me?!?" I know my face started getting red. When I get mad this is what I do, I start to yell, then my face reddens then I broaden my shoulders. I don't know why I do this, but it's something I've done since I was a kid.
After going back and fourth for a while he finally admits that they went to a bar.
A fucking bar? Really? Is that all this was all about? He went to a bar and felt the need to lie about it? Something is up here. . . .
He tells me that my father told him to lie and gave him that story. "I probably believe that, because like I said my dad is thirsty. For whatever reason my husband decided to tell me the story when he could have just said that they were going to stop at a bar on the way home.
He could have avoided everything, instead he failed to communicate with me. What a fucking tard. Then he gets mad at me and says well your dad said you would have gotten mad.
*Excuse me, who here has to live with my dad??? Oh that's right........NO ONE!*
"Your an idiot to think that I would believe that story!" And my dads an idiot to tell you to tell me that story!" "You are both idiots for thinking I would buy something that smells that fishy!"
I ended up going to bed a little early. I felt ill in more than one way. When he decided to come to bed, he tried to cuddle up to me. *Not a smart move*
Me: "Get off me!"
Him: "I just want to cuddle."
Me: "You haven't apologized yet, so get off me!"
I scoot away to the very edge of the bed.
A few hours later I asked him to move because he was crowding me. Thankfully he complied with no resistance.
This morning is none for the better, he has already started his narcissistic tendencies and told me that he was done with everything, with all my petty ass bs.
We have been arguing all morning. *I give him this though... he did apologize for lying before he left for work.* Right now I am so sick of him and his ego. I wish he would stop being selfish for a little while and just listen to what's bothering me. If he could do that and not turn it into something about him for once... it really would be a miracle.
My husband came home late last night smelling of alcohol. I asked him where he got the drink from and he said that a friend at work gave it to him. Bull SHIT! Lets go back to earlier that day during a phone conversation.
"Hey hun guess who I just seen?" he says
" I don't know who?"
"Nikki"
"You mean that bitch you fucked around with a couple of years ago?"
He then says, " Yea, she was waving at me in a parking lot"
"Did you wave back?" I ask.
"I just threw my hand up and kept driving"
Now we all know that it really didn't go like that. He fucked this homewrecker for 6 months before getting busted. Then she gets pregnant and isn't sure if the baby belongs to my man or hers. Nice huh!?!!?
Then he comes home with alcohol on his breath, yea I know where he was.
This set of events triggered me to take a look into his phone.
Then I see this text to my brother-in-law
"If she asks I had a beer over there last night"
He was referring to the prior evening when he said that his truck broke down at his sisters house.
I marched my happy ass into the bathroom where he was showering and asked him where he had a drink at last night.
He continues his lie.
Then I ask about the text.
He looks at me with this fucking grin that just makes me want to rip out his teeth.
Then he changes his story and says that he bought one at a gas station on the way over to his sisters and drank it while he worked on his truck.
I told him I didn't want to hear anymore bullshit lies and I wasn't going to deal with him tonight.
I grabbed my pillow and a blanket and lay on the couch.
After he was done with his shower he comes to the couch and changes his story again.
This time he tells me that he got it from his sister's and drank it over there.
I slept on the couch because it was better than sleeping with a moron.
I woke this morning with a sore back, but at least my mind felt more refreshed.
Grrr Men.....Piss on them all!
